#36 ASK KATARINA: How to be angry elegantly? 😡

#36 ASK KATARINA: How to be angry elegantly? 😡

The other day a friend of mine asked me whether I ever get angry since I focus on teaching good manners and elegance.
Well, just like I told her, let me put it this way: I might teach etiquette but I am not a robot
😅

Anger is one of the most common emotions we experience. It's natural to feel frustrated or upset when things don’t go as planned or when we face challenges. This goes for me and anyone else. However, how we handle that anger emotion can define our character and relationships. Elegant anger management doesn't mean suppressing your feelings, but rather processing them in a constructive, respectful way.

Anger is Normal, But Outbursts Aren't Necessary
Paradoxically, anger can even be a helpful emotion, alerting us to situations that feel unjust or unfair. But it’s what we do with that anger that truly matters. Resorting to vulgar language, violent outbursts, or impulsive reactions can damage not only our relationships but also our reputation.

Elegance Through Emotional Control
Good etiquette is about more than just knowing which fork to use or holding doors open. It’s also about how we treat others in moments of emotional strain. When anger arises, we can express it with tact and composure. This means choosing our words carefully, speaking calmly, and addressing the issue without personal attacks.

Take a moment to breathe when you feel anger bubbling up. Step back, reflect, and ask yourself, “How can I address this situation in a way that honours both my feelings and the dignity of those involved?”

Good Manners and Managing Anger
Practising good manners in moments of serenity is easy, but practising them in moments of frustration is an art form. Politeness and self-control show others that you value their dignity, even in disagreement. For instance, instead of reacting sharply in the heat of the moment, you can state your feelings calmly: “I feel upset about this situation, and I’d like to discuss it.”

This approach not only helps resolve conflicts peacefully but also ensures that you remain in control of the situation, expressing your discomfort and projecting grace and strength.

After all, a composed, thoughtful response will always leave a lasting impression, one built on respect and self-respect.

I wish you a beautiful day ahead!

Yours sincerely,
Katarina


Receive new etiquette tips from Katarina every week, sign up here. 

Do you wish to become confident at any dining venue and navigate every culinary occasion with ease? Let me teach you dining etiquette from A to Z in my practical ebook! As a bonus, you will receive a FREE guide on how to tame tricky foods such as shrimp, oysters or escargot.

Back to blog