Dear Readers,
With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, the air is buzzing with romance, anticipation… and, let’s be honest, the occasional awkward first date. If you’re sailing through the dating world, chances are you’ll encounter situations where you realise a connection simply isn’t there.
So, what’s the best way to let someone down gently? I do have to admit that the headline of this newsletter might be a bit misleading as, technically, there is no such thing as "polite ghosting." Ghosting - the act of suddenly cutting off all communication - is inherently rude because it leaves the other person in the dark, wondering what went wrong.
Instead, a much kinder solution is to decline someone's interest respectfully.
TIPS ON HOW TO DECLINE KINDLY
If you’ve decided not to pursue things further, here’s how you can communicate your decision respectfully:
Be Honest, Yet Kind
A simple, direct message can go a long way. For example: "Thank you for meeting me. I enjoyed our time together, but I don’t feel a romantic connection. I wish you all the best."
Avoid Over-Explaining
You don’t owe anyone a detailed list of reasons. Keep it concise.
Use "I" Statements
Focus on your feelings rather than their shortcomings to avoid unnecessary hurt. For example, "I feel we’re not a good match," rather than, "You’re not my type."
WHEN POLITENESS ISN’T REQUIRED
Not every interaction warrants closure. If someone has made you feel unsafe, disrespected your boundaries, or acted inappropriately, you have no obligation to engage further. Protecting your well-being is far more important than good manners. In such cases, walking away without explanation is perfectly valid.
ON A FINAL NOTE
While Valentine’s season can create some magical first dates, it’s equally important to navigate the dating world with respect and self-respect. If you decide to part ways, aim for a graceful exit when possible - but never at the expense of your comfort or safety.
Here’s to making connections… or politely declining them.
Yours sincerely,
Katarina
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